a question i am asking myself. What is in there? Well, where, exactly, you may be wondering?
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each of these rocks has been collected over the years |
answer:
my heart.
honestly, i don't like what i am seeing.
first, let me say that i love the Lord Jesus. He has redeemed my life from the pit. HE has purchased me with His own blood, that i might be made righteous. Amazing grace has truly saved a wretch like me. Because of the high price that was paid for me, i see even the smallest of offences as equal to the most heinous of sins. Sin. black, disgusting sin. Sin that my Saviour died for. My sin, that caused my Saviour to drink the cup of the wrath of God on my behalf, so that I might have HIS righteousness imputed to me. Incomprehensible. Humbling.
on a day to day basis, within the walls of my home, so much of what is in my heart comes out: a snappy reply, an exasperated sigh, a grumpy greeting, a "don't talk to me right now, or else" look. ouch. When i am with others, i can kick in to my "self-preservation" mode pretty quickly: fear of what others think of me, fear that i may offend in some way, fear of not being "enough" for others...
really just a bunch of self-centeredness! double-ouch. my own selfishness disgusts me. my husband works hard all day, and comes home to me not having even given
much any thought to dinner. I claim i was too busy, too tired, too ______. Hmmm.
he is tired too.
he is busy too. he has had to fight battles all day at work, yet i claim i am too tired to make dinner. Lord, have mercy on me... a sinner. Yes, i have battles during the day. Homeschooling 3 of our kids definitely brings about some battles. But if i am completely honest,
i do have time to make dinner. i do have time to get the house tidy, with the kids' help.
i DO have time.
i obviously have time, since i am sitting here composing this post!!
i am not hopeless though. Our faithful God uses the challenges of my day to work His sanctification in me. I am seeing that i am in need. i am seeing that time in the Word is not something that can be compromised in my day, so that i can do
other things. I am seeing that i am ever in need of grace.
if you are seeing an area in your own heart that needs cleansing, don't delay! Forgiveness awaits in the bountiful arms of our Great God, through our great Saviour, Jesus Christ!
Marvelous grace of our loving Lord,
Grace that exceeds our sin and our guilt!
Yonder on Calvary's mount outpoured,
There where the blood of the Lamb was spilled.
Grace, grace, God's grace,
Grace that will pardon and cleanse within;
Grace, grace, God's grace,
Grace that is greater than all our sin!
Sin and despair, like the sea waves cold,
Threaten the soul with infinite loss;
Grace that is greater, yes, grace untold,
Points to the refuge, the mighty cross.
Grace, grace, God's grace,
Grace that will pardon and cleanse within;
Grace, grace, God's grace,
Grace that is greater than all our sin!
Dark is the stain that we cannot hide.
What can avail to wash it away?
Look! There is flowing a crimson tide,
Brighter than snow you may be today.
Grace, grace, God's grace,
Grace that will pardon and cleanse within;
Grace, grace, God's grace,
Grace that is greater than all our sin!
Marvelous, infinite, matchless grace,
Freely bestowed on all who believe!
You that are longing to see His face,
Will you this moment His grace receive?
Grace, grace, God's grace,
Grace that will pardon and cleanse within;
Grace, grace, God's grace,
Grace that is greater than all our sin!
~Julia H. Johnston