Feel the Night

This song is exquisite.

These Are Written So You May Believe

{UPDATE: thanks to a friend, i realized that the video somehow was deleted as i was inserting the lyrics! Now the video is there :) }

This song caught my attention one morning on the radio. I looked them up and saw this beautiful animation to go with their song. The group is a husband/wife duo called The Lockwood's.

Here is what they say about this song on their site: In April 2013, we had the privilege of sharing our music with Bethlehem Baptist Church in Minneapolis. We wanted to gift them with a song written especially for them, and so we trusted God for the inspiration that was needed. God ended up giving us “These are Written” after many hours of pressing in to not only the gospel accounts of what Jesus has done, but also pressing into how those stories help us understand what He is doing in our lives in this present moment. We want this song to be a great comfort especially to believers who are suffering, and we know that as they behold this Jesus who suffered and died willingly in their place, they will indeed be comforted.

“These are Written” by Patrick and Molly Lockwood

Lyrics:

Jesus calmed the waters on the Sea of Galilee

And today He spoke peace to the fears in me

Jesus turned water at a wedding into wine

Just today He turned my worry into peace of mind

Jesus broke bread with the whores and thieves

He bent down to wash His friend Peter’s feet

When I felt so dirty, so beyond love’s reach

He called out to say that He was not ashamed of me

These are written so may believe

And that by believing you may have life in His name

Jesus healed a man who spent his whole life lame

Well He cleansed my past; I’ve got a brand new name

He told a woman at a well all she’d ever done

Yea He knows me better than anyone

Where guilt ran deep, where shame flowed wide

Jesus opened all the parts of me I tried to hide

He gave me water to drink that won’t run dry

He died my death and gave me life

These are written so you may believe

And that by believing you may have life in His name

Jesus, Immanuel, Savior, Messiah, Son of man, Son of God, Holy and Anointed One, Good Shepherd, Great High Priest, Servant King, Prince of Peace, Bread of Life, Living Water, He is the Way, the Truth, the Life, Light of the World, Beginning and the End, Lily of the Valley, My Truest Friend, Mighty Lion, Humble Lamb, Risen Lord, The Great “I AM”

These are written so you may believe

And that by believing you may have life in His name

Morning may bring a brand new pain

With suffering I’m afraid to face

Confronted by things I cannot change

I’ll remember how Jesus calmed the crashing waves!

I’ll remember how Jesus healed a woman who had bled twelve years

He showed mercy to the thief who confessed through tears

He blessed the widow at the temple for the penny she gave

Jesus called Lazarus out of the grave!

And He suffered and died on a Roman tree

But He laid His life down willingly

In three days He rose as He had said

And now in Christ, death is dead

These are written so you may believe

from Penal Suffering to Loving Sovereignty

When our church held their Thanksgiving Eve service, i was asked to give a testimony about how I had learned that God didn't just love me because He had to, but that He actually liked me. This past year has been truly one of the most difficult years i have had. This saturday will mark the one-year anniversary of my Dad's death. This is not an anniversary i wanted to have, nor do i celebrate it, though through some tears i am remembering the good things about who he was. Through this year, i have learned more about God, the gospel, and myself than i could have without walking through the suffering and pain.

I share my testimony here....it should take about 7-10 minutes to read :)

From Penal Suffering to Loving Sovereignty ~ Thanksgiving Eve, 2013

(the following paragraph are all song titles that have ministered God's truth to me through the last number of months) 

Though You Slay Me and Move in Mysterious Ways, I will Turn My Eyes Upon Jesus, and cry out, "Jesus, Draw Me Ever Nearer". Because You Walked in Lonely Places, I can now Lift Up My Sorrows, knowing that You Did That For Me. Amazing Grace sets me on A Firm Foundation, knowing that Jesus exchanged His Robes for Mine. In Christ Alone can I truly say "It Is Well With My Soul!" Amazing love, how can it be that Thou, my God, shouldst die for me? Praise the Lord, for GREAT things He IS doing!!

Sara Groves simply, yet profoundly states “I believe in a peace that flows deeper than pain, 

That broken find healing in love; Pain is no measure of His faithfulness, He withholds no good thing from us.”

I could not say that with confidence a few months ago. I grew up overhearing it said about me that i was loved, because i had to be, but that i was not liked. I had wrongly assumed that God felt the same way.  I believed that God loved me out of obligation, because He promised to since i had called on the name of Christ. Yet it was a begrudging love; A love that was just waiting for me to mess up so that He could punish me. I falsely believed that He only tolerated me; that the sufferings and trials i faced in life were punishments for my sin, because Christ’s death simply wasn’t enough. I still had to pay.

But God…!

Over the past months, God has faithfully revealed to me my sinful thinking. Through reading His precious Word, the preaching of His Word, godly counsel, and other books, God has lovingly shown me the Truth through His Holy Spirit.

And what is that Truth? It is that He, God, likes me. He doesn’t love me because He has to, He actually delights in me.. 

 “The Lord your God is in your midst,A victorious warrior.He will exult over you with joy,He will be quiet in His love,He will rejoice over you with shouts of joy. Zephaniah 3:17

His Word says in Ephesians 1:3-7 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, ⁴ just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we would be holy and blameless before ^[d]Him. In love^5 [e]He predestined us to adoption as sons through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the ^[f]kind intention of His will, ⁶ to the praise of the glory of His grace, which He freely bestowed on us in the Beloved.

I have learned that God is a loving Sovereign; that the trials and sufferings I face are given to me by a loving Father who is working all things to my good, in order to conform me to the image of His glorious Son. Believe me when I say that the last verse I wanted to hear after my Dad died and all the trials since, was Romans 8:28. But one day, someone pointed out to me that verse 29 follows! Here it is…Here is WHY God causes ALL things (yes, even that really painful situation) to work for the good of the called:  And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. ²⁹ For those whom He foreknew, He also predestined to become conformed to the image of His Son.

I can now truly believe and embrace the truths that Joseph Alliene penned so very long ago:

From the curse of the cross I will deliver you (Psalm 119:71). Afflictions shall prove a wholesome cup to you; your Lord has drunk the venom into His won body, and what remains for you is but a healthful potion which I promise shall work for your good (Romans 8:28). Be not afraid to drink, nor desire that the cup should pass from you. I bless the cup before I give it to you (Job 5:17). Drink all of it and be thankful; you shall find My blessing a the bottom of the cup to sweeten the sharpest afflictions to you (James 1:12; Psalm 94:12). I will stand by you in all conditions, and be a fast Friend to you in every change (Isaiah 43:2). In the wilderness I will speak comfortably to you, and in the fire and water I will be with you (Hosea 2:14). I will be a strength to the poor and a strength to the needy in his distress; a refuge from the storm, and  a shadow from the heat, when the blast of terrible ones is as a storm against the wall (Isaiah 25:4). Your sufferings shall not be a cup of wrath, but a grace cup; not a curse, but a cure; not a cup of trembling, but a cup of blessing to you (Hebrews 12:6-8). They shall not hurt you, but heal you (Psalm 119:67). My blessing shall attend you in every condition (Genesis 26:3).  from The Precious Promises of the Gospel, pg. 10  (note: this book was written from the perspective of God speaking the Gospel truth to His people. It is full of Scripture. It is taking the promises and truths of the Word and writing them out as though God were saying them personally to you. It is not to be read AS Scripture, but as a more devotional reading, with study of the Scriptures mentioned). 

In summary, Colossians 3:3 states For you have died and your life is hidden with Christ in God. ⁴ When Christ, who is our life, is revealed, then you also will be revealed with Him in glory. I will just read a part from my journal that I think best expresses how this verse helped me see the love of God:

I have begun to wrestle with being IN Christ. I read Romans 8 again yesterday. Read Col. 3:1-2. prayed. As I started working on the thought that God loves me because he is obligated to because I have followed Christ, but he doesn't like me very much, it started to penetrate.. that I am IN Christ.It hit me. I have to die. die to so many of my fleshly desires. And that all the stuff in Romans 8 is true that He will raise me up to life in Christ. then I realized that Col. 3 is true! I am hidden with Christ, in God. God see's all the goodness of Christ when He looks at me. I am hidden IN Christ, and hidden WITH Christ. So, God looks at Christ, and He doesn't tolerate Christ. He loves Him. He enjoys Him. Christ is His Son. And I am hidden within that.  I am choosing to not despise this small step, to walk on in faith. To press in. To BELIEVE this truth, regardless of feelings; to RECKON IT SO.

A few quotes and I am done. One email I received simply stated this: Jeanette the Lord likes you a lot. I just wept when I read that. And another said this: Your story is being woven together by a Master Artisan Whose ways are so mysterious and often painful, yet so glorious and beautiful!

John Piper has snippets of a sermon piped into a song by Shane & Shane called Though You Slay Me: this song was significant in this journey. He says that our pain is not meaningless. It has a purpose, whether it was cancer, or criticism, sickness or slander… it is producing and eternal weight of glory. We may never see the purpose here, but we can know that we are loved more than we ever deserve, we are liked and delighted in by our loving Sovereign, and He IS WORKING ALL THINGS FOR THE GOOD OF THOSE WHO ARE THE CALLED!

2 Corinthians 4:8-9,  we are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not despairing;⁹ persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed;…therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day. ¹⁷ For momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison, ¹⁸ while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal.

Paul Tripp says this: “So God’s grace isn’t always comfortable, because He isn’t primarily working on our comfort; He’s working on our character. With violent grace He will crush us because He loves us, and is committed to our restoration, deliverance, and refinement. And THAT is something worth celebrating.”

I close with a hymn by the Getty’s. May this be the prayer of all of our hearts:

Jesus, Draw me ever nearer

As I labor through the storm

You have called me to this passage

And I'll follow, though I'm worn

May this journey bring a blessing

May I rise on wings of faith

And at the end of my hearts testing

With Your likeness let me wake

Jesus, guide me through the tempest

Keep my spirit stayed and sure

When the midnight meets the morning

Let me love You even more

May this journey bring a blessing

May I rise on wings of faith

And at the end of my hearts testing

With Your likeness let me wake

Let the treasures of the trial

Form within me as I go

And at the end of this long passage

Let me leave them at your throne

May this journey bring a blessing

May I rise on wings of faith

And at the end of my hearts testing

With Your likeness let me wake

we will understand....just not yet

This song brings me to my knees. the honesty. the beauty. the searching. the Truth. Farther along, we WILL know all about it. Am i willing, are you willing, to sit in the in between.

let the flood wash me of my doubts, fears, sins, burdens!

"His is the Kingdom, we're the guests... O Lord, Come soon!"



"Farther Along" - Josh Garrels from Josh Garrels on Vimeo.

Farther along we'll know all about itFarther along we'll understand whyCheer up my brothers, live in the sunshineWe'll understand this, all by and by

Tempted and tried, I wondered whyThe good man died, the bad man thrivesAnd Jesus cries because he loves em' bothWe're all cast-aways in need of ropesHangin' on by the last threads of our hopeIn a house of mirrors full of smokeConfusing illusions I've seen

Where did I go wrong, I sang alongTo every chorus of the songThat the devil wrote like a piper at the gatesLeading mice and men down to their fatesBut some will courageously escapeThe seductive voice with a heart of faithWhile walkin' that line back home

So much more to life than we've been toldIt's full of beauty that will unfoldAnd shine like you struck gold my wayward sonThat deadweight burden weighs a tonGo down into the river and let it runAnd wash away all the things you've doneForgiveness, alright

Chorus

Still I get hard pressed on every sideBetween the rock and a compromiseLike the truth and pack of lies fightin' for my soulAnd I've got no place left goCause I got changed by what I've been shownMore glory than the world has knownKeeps me ramblin' on

Skipping like a calf loosed from its stallI'm free to love once and for allAnd even when I fall I'll get back upFor the joy that overflows my cupHeaven filled me with more than enoughBroke down my levee and my bluffLet the flood wash me

And one day when the sky rolls back on usSome rejoice and the others fussCause every knee must bow and tongue confessThat the Son of God is forever blessedHis is the kingdom, we're the guestsSo put your voice up to the testSing Lord, come soon

Chorus(lyrics to Farther Along, emphasis mine)

Victory

pic taken with flash

February 25-26, 2011 marks the weekend that i was given this beautiful glass piece by a sweet friend. I attended a conference (i am not a conf. junkie, so it was a rare event for me) put on by a church in Hudson, WI. There were two beautiful women, Carla and Kristi, who talked to me about it, friends on facebook and through the bloggy-world. At this conference i would get to meet them for the first time, and what a meeting it was! When i was given this sun-catcher, made by Kristi, i was floored. The conference hadn't even started yet, and i was in tears. I went to that place broken crushed and undone. My life was a mess. It was literally my last effort at keeping my life together.  These women knew what had been happening, and i believe they prayed me there! Kristi handed me the package, and simply said, "Victory". Little did i know just how much victory would be mine as a result of the Word of God sung by Sara Groves, the Word of God taught by Susie Larson, and the prayers of so many on my behalf. That weekend literally changed my life. God restored me, emotionally and spiritually. I left that place Saturday afternoon a different person... i was FREE. I had HOPE. God had brought about VICTORY.  I am celebrating the awesome work God did then, and continues to do now.

Things did not magically get better in my life. I still had difficulties to walk and work through, but i knew i was no longer alone. I knew that God had a purpose for me. I knew that God was carrying me tenderly in His amazing arms.

This past autumn and winter have been difficult in many ways, including the death of my earthly dad, Ben, on January 25th. Through it all, i have learned to lean in closer to my God, to my Jesus. I have learned to focus on Christ...to keep my eyes fixed on Christ. I have learned to praise Him in the midst of some of the deepest pain i have gone through in my life, for He is worthy. I have learned to allow myself to be loved. Loved by God in Christ, and loved by others. Love without fear.

I have learned to do battle from a place of victory, as the enemy is defeated in the end.

All in all, that one little word, spoken almost 2 years ago now, has changed me. It has become my reality. VICTORY.... IN JESUS!  Victory..... in the cross of Christ. VICTORY!

This precious gift hangs in my kitchen window. It is stunning as it catches the light, and makes little rainbows in my kitchen. And when i see it...it reminds me of all that God has freed me from,  and of all the promises of God that are mine in Christ.

Thank you, Kristi, for such a precious gift in that one word, and for the physical reminder of it.  

w/o flash

**There are many who have prayed with/for me through the years... thank you to all of you. God is faithful.